Miscellanea bis

1. Good luck to people writing AP exams. Especially the AP Stat people, who need all the luck they can get.
2. Good luck to the China group in 3D Graphic Arts. Maybe your DVD will just randomly start working tomorrow. Yeah. That's it. Random divine intervention.
   
3. Good luck to the other Ottawa teams in the Reach provincials (Gloucester and… um… I'll get back with the other one). Unless you happen to be playing against us. Then all the luck is ours. OURS! OUR PRECIOUS!

Very funny things:

1. Data vs. Control Panel: BSoD 1, Data 0.
2. German Forklift Instruction Video: Achtung! Contains a lot of (obviously and humourously fake) blood!
   

Righteous Smiteage et al. FTW!

Never-before-seen picture of what happened to our opposition at the city-level Reach tourney last Friday:
I recognize that some of said opposition might consider the above statement to be a slight exaggeration. In fact, I have received communications to that effect, and this is what happened to the senders of those communications:

Other members of our opposition have now learned the value of not being seen.

In all seriousness, however, I have not received communications from the members of the Reach teams we so righteously smote (have smitten?) because the odds of any of them having read this blog are nil. Apparently (Google Analytics FTW!) 65% of visitors to this blog arrived via Wikipedia (would the next person to arrive here via Wikipedia please explain to me why there's a link here on Wikipedia), 15% came from the Spacesim forums, 15% came from somewhere else on Blogger (that 15% was probably me), and the remaining 15% came direct (again, probably me, since I'm pretty sure that nobody's bookmarked this). This leaves 0% of visitors who come from random other websites, which makes sense, since AFAIK my Wikipedia userpage, the Sim forums, and Blogger are the only websites which link here.

Miscellanea

Item: 3-D Graphic Arts is teh major workload. James, Chris, Steven, and Olivier, if you're reading this (even though the odds of that are virtually nil) you should stop reading it and animate something. I don't care if it's a large brick wall—make it move!
Item: Whoever the adjudicator Senior Band got tonight was (I can't remember his name, although it was mentioned once or twice), he is teh roxxorz. You can tell me that two double golds doesn't add/multiply to make a quad gold, but I'm not listening. Thinking this way gives me mental ammunition for thinking that we're better than Canterbury et al.
Item: I claim a control point for the forces of Grammar and Syntax for convincing Bryce that it's pronounced 'vee-ah', not 'vee eye eh'.

Conspiracy

I've done it! I have irrefutable evidence of a Vatican-Opus Dei-Illuminati-CIA-Mafia-Communist-LBJ-Teamsters-Freemason-
Texan-Cabalist-Anarcho-Syndicalist-Bolshevik-Rosicrucian-Knights
Templar-NASA-Music Department conspiracy to prevent me from getting sleep! This conspiracy must exist, for how else would the decision to make tomorrow's band rehearsal have been made so soon after I mentioned in an earlier post how I needed sleep? Obviously Mr. Arrigo doesn't read this blog, so one of the many parties named in the above Hyphenated String of Doom™ must have acquired privileged information about my mental health and sold it for their advantage.

Anyone who suggests that TINC or that the 'conspiracy' is actually the product of the ravings of a tired mind is evidently a member of the VODICMCLBJTFTCASBRKTNASAMD conspiracy sent to silence my protests and prevent me from revealing their existence to the world.

Anyone who mentions that using a blog that exactly three people besides myself have been known to read is hardly the best way to reveal sensitive information to the world also belongs to the VODICMCLBJTFTCASBRKTNASAMD.

Sleep! Gimme! Graaw!

I need more sleep. Case in point:

"I think he's just both saying they're loud." ~ Me, at band this morning

On the other hand, it's not like sleep is especially appealing when compared to other late-night pursuits like Civ IV, perusing the Spacesim forums, and writing blog posts complaining about lack of sleep. It is appealing when compared to homework, however; it's a pity that, unlike sleep and other favoured activities, homework is not postponable or optional.

Case in point: right now, I'm studying for a Latin vocab test. This task is made harder because I'm not sure whether to study the short, end-of-chapter list or the long set of lists after each story, so, to be prudent, I'm studying both. I probably should have asked which to study, but, in my tired state, I failed to recall in class that I would be having this problem tonight. Oops. Also, I have no way of contacting either of my fellow students to see what they know. Oops.
If by some wonderful coincidence Bora or Colin happen to read this before the test, please please please would you tell me what I'm supposed to study?

Pwnage, Pwndness, and Pain

Three points:

1. I apologize in advance for my remarks to the other teams in our division at the recent Reach Tournament, but there was much righteous pwnage happening at that event.
2. I also apologize to my fellow attendees at the OCESS Astros' after-party for my evinced lack of skills at DDR, Halo 2, and Ghost Recon. I plead inability to play any game that doesn't involve any two of a keyboard, a mouse, and turns.
3. I don't know why I mentioned pain in the title for this post. I needed a third noun that starts with P. Sue me.

Maybe my third word should have been Plaintiff. But that wouldn't have made any sense at the time.

It doesn't make any sense now, either, as a matter of fact.

I still haven't received any comments in response to my offer of three cwt of dung, a dead Indian, and the M4 Motorway. I would like to get these goods off of my hands, as the dung already smells bad, the Indian is putrefying and will soon smell worse than the dung (in addition to breeding parasitic insects), and I really have no use for a highway on another continent. The preceding sentence probably torpedoed any chance I might have had of convincing someone to take up my offer, but I really don't care. I'm too tired to care. I'm too tired to type the rest of this sentennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnblagh.

Plague

I should probably explain my absence from various events like ICS, the OCESS debrief, and the Hybrid tournament over the last couple of days.
The exciting explanation is that I was abducted by aliens while fleeing pursuing Roman soldiers, then dropped back where I came from; although it felt like a few seconds of flight, relativistic effects meant that I missed a full day of events.
The boring explanation is that I was too sick to do much of anything besides complain about being sick, eat applesauce, throw up, and sleep.

It is your prerogative to determine which of the above is the better explanation.

Power corrupts, and absolute power…

Muahahaha! My head minion-ship has placed me in a position of supreme power over the puny members of the Maya Group in Graphics Arts. They are as pawns to my control. They are inconsequential. They are motes on the endless wheel of time.

Now all I need to do is avoid having the power go to my head.

Irregularity

I would take this opportunity to explain away the lack of posts here over the last week, but I would only do that if I was aware that people are actually reading this. Accordingly, the first three people to post comments here will receive three cwt of dung, a dead Indian, and the M4 Motorway. The first three people to not post comments will be won in a police raffle while on the M4 motorway.

Yes, I know that that was a blatant Monty Python takeoff, with no humourous value of its own.

On a note which has no connexion to any of the above save the title, David Morgan-Marr has come up with a plausible explanation of the Stormtrooper Effect.
But some of you (i.e. Jamie) already saw that comic.

EDIT:
Clarification: comments should be posted to this post specifically.

Seren(dip)ity, Self-Aggrandizement

I apologize for the recent lack of posts; my aunt and cousin have come in from Kincardine, and I have recently been engaged in the First World War of my latest Civ IV game, which just happened to start in 1914. That seems just a bit too odd to be coincidence.

'Course, who exactly am I apologizing to? I don't want to flatter myself by claiming a regular readership….

My gratitude to the Language Department for making Serenity the movie for teacher-less classes has been tempered by my dismay at the group of students who insisted on watching Shrek 2 afterwards. I can only thank my luck that I had my iPod, for without the Parachute Game, I would surely have been driven mad with boredom.

Explosions, blackmail, and Giraffes

I must apologize to the Language Dept. and Mr. Derry in particular for complaining about having to watch Ferris Bueller's Day Off instead of getting Latin cancelled today and tomorrow. This apology is owed because we did not, in fact, watch Ferris; rather, we watched Serenity, the sequel to Firefly (R.I.P.). The twin facts that this movie, unlike Ferris, contains explosions and does not contain 80's music make it a much better movie, to which it must be added that I've already seen Ferris twice.

This almost makes me pity the vast majority of my Latin Class, who were mysteriously not in the Aud. No names shall be named… if I hear from **** or ***** about a fee within the hour (jk).

I shall take this opportunity to again point out to Simon that the Giraffe incident was highly amusing. He knows what I'm talking about. Most of the rest of you don't. Enough said.

This post has no subject.

It has come to my attention that certain unnamed readers—that would be you, Jamie—are critiquing the length of this blog. If it makes them/him feel any better, I could add a few pages of Lorem ipsum after the more intelligible portion of each post.

But I digress.

Or would have digressed had I any subject to digress from.

Owing to a complete lack of subject to digress from, the following must also be related to the hypothetical meta-subject of this post:
Where's Willy?
Because everybody needs to know where their money was previously and where it gets to after they spend it.

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Pain

Gaaah! Cold! Pain!

Pain shall also be inflicted upon the OPL for sending me the last book in a series first. Grrr.

Pain was also inflicted upon my hand in English today. Why do my essays always end up being so long — unless I want them to be?

On the bright side, my comp apparently pwns the school's new Graphics Arts computers. It renders exactly twice as fast, which leads me to believe that it may have something to do with its dual-processor-ness.

Oyez, Oyez!

New blog FTW!

…

And you're waiting for me to post what, exactly?

OK, OK, I kid.
Except for the part about not posting anything important.
More to follow